REVENGE - Gorgonzola

Gorgonzola: that’s nice and smelly, thought Sal. Sal was pure vitriol, unlike her sweet, studious sister Suzie. That’s why Suzie’s partner Marty had left her, he wouldn’t have dared to leave Sal. It was Marty’s house and it had never really been Suzie’s home.

Sal balanced atop the ladder fiddling and crinkling up her face in pure mirth- oh what a jolly jape. But actually Marty deserved it, he deserved everything that was coming for him; it was just a question of time. Sal let herself out of the house, she’d come to fetch some of Suzie’s clothes but then the Gorgonzola in her basket had started to groan loudly and the  soufflé planned for supper could just go hang.  And Marty and his new play mate Jess were out until late so Suzie would never know. Sal had always hated Marty with his dark Lavazza looks and his  keen eye for other women and then along came Jess ‘plop’ into his lap like a beautiful gift wrapped goddess and he started playing away. 

For a time they were happy, it was all about sex anyway and Suzie was convinced there was nothing much above Jess’s neck except for fluff and nonsense. Then things started to happen- it had been a particularly long hot summer where the heat seeped into the very fabric of the house when they noticed the smell. It started as a whiff which soon became a stench until the sitting room became quite unbearable. Marty called in the usual agencies and after a thorough search they discovered nothing amiss. But the smell grew distinct and became strongly noticeable in all of the other rooms; the kitchen was dreadful and the bedroom even worse. At long last they had no option but to try and sell the house, but one sniff and all potential buyers fled gagging. So the price dropped and dropped and then Jess also decided to drop out of Marty’s life and he didn’t do ‘alone’.

Suzie had always loved the house and was surprised to see it on the market at a very affordable price indeed and well within her budget. So she put in an offer, but didn’t want Marty to know that it was she. The estate agent was happy with this as the house had been a nightmare to sell and as she didn’t even wish to view it- even better. And so the sale went through and Marty moved out to a tiny sweet smelling basement flat on a busy arterial road.

Sal had opened all the windows to let the sunshine in when she glanced up nonchalantly at the curtain rails and said, ‘I’d get rid of those Suzie, they just don’t fit in with this house anymore. We should burn them. I’ll get you some of those metal ones you like as a housewarming present.’

Suzie was too dazed with happiness and disbelief to take much notice of her sister’s ramblings. Revenge is sweet, thought Sal as she took the rails outside at arm’s length and set a match to them with much good humour and a very cheesy smile upon her lips.